One of my favorite ways to look back at the past year is with 10Q whose slogan is: Reflect. React. Renew. Life’s Biggest Questions. Answered By You.
Rereading my 10Q answers from last year and answering the first question, of 2011 I see that my focus has shifted completely. A year ago I was searching for something–a purpose. Wanting more from my life, I decided to go back to school to study nutrition (or medicine). I wanted my life to be slightly different than it was.
A month ago my father was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and my perspective changed completely. Instead of wishing for a slightly different life, now I want to cling desperately to life as I know it now with my family. I am heartbroken by the news that someone so close to me is so sick but I am also amazed that this sad news would allow me to be more content person at the same time that I am devastated.
Last spring my cat was diagnosed with lymphoma. She spent the summer at the vet and returned to us this fall. I have to give her steroids every morning and chemo three times a week. Thin and frail with a sharp bony back my cat is now lying on my kitchen floor looking not that bad. The chemo and steroids seem to be working. I can hear my mother rolling her eyes over the phone wondering out loud why we don’t put her to sleep, but right before she got sick she caught a mouse. When the vet told us she had cancer and we had to make a decision about whether to put her to sleep my husband said “She did catch that mouse.”
It is massively inconvenient to have a sick cat and it is heartbreaking to face illness. But these challenges bring a reflection to my life and make me realize how lucky I am. The irony is that even in health my cat was pretty unfriendly and somehow in sickness she is a nicer cat.
Life is a rollercoaster and I don’t blog as much lately. Forgive me. My “never a dull moment” life has really made me step away from my computer to be with my family–and my cat.
Happy New Year and visit 10Q now so you can remember today before next year is upon us.